(aren't you glad you can't hear them?)

You would've had to be living under a rock not to have heard the big news in the cat world this week. Cody Cuccinelli, up and coming actor and younger brother of mega-rock star Columbus Cuccinelli (better known to his fans simply as "Lumby"), broke hearts around the world as Hollywood's most eligible bachelor wed his latest sweetheart, top feline model Charisma Kitt. Kitt, if you recall, was engaged to Prince Fancy, the flamboyant heir to the Fancy Feast fortune, before meeting and falling in love with Cuccinelli while the two worked together on his latest film, Cat Avengers.

Cody Cuccinelli, pictured here on the set of last year's box office smash movie, Cat Avengers. When asked if he regretted breaking up the long-standing engagement between his bride and Fancy, he merely offered that trademark grin his fans have come to love and commented, "she was too much cat for him."

Lumby's latest CD, Kat Kong topped the charts in its first week of release. Fans hoping to catch a glimpse of their hero at his brother's wedding were disappointed as the rock star was unable to break away from his band's current European tour.

Charisma and Fancy caught by papparazzi during an intimate dinner for two on the Riviera last year.

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Cody and Charisma Cuccinelli, the happy groom and bride. They plan to start working on a family immediately. "I love kittens," Charisma replied happily.

Family portrait (left to right): Cody, his mother, Clara Cuccinelli, Charisma's mother, Maude Kitt, and Charisma.

Dr. Sol Cuccinelli had to leave the reception early to deliver a Siamese litter. When asked to comment, he said mother and kittens were doing fine. He also admitted to being very proud of his son and said Charisma would make a nice addition to the family, throwing her much-valued Persian genes into their pool.

Unfortunately, news wasn't so good from the Kitt side of the family as Charisma's father once again fell off the wagon and made an utter fool of himself. Maude Kitt was forced to drag her drunken husband home by his tail to avoid any further embarrassment.

Cody's half-brother, Scooter, wasn't about to let the Kitt family turmoil spoil his appetite. As he put it, he had to make up for brother Lumby's absence, who as everyone knows, never met a meal he couldn't eat.

The guest list was littered with luminaries, including Queen Fluffy of Persiana (below left), a distant cousin of Maude Kitt's, and Clara Cuccinelli's uncle, Texas oil mogul Slim "Six Toes" Nelson, who accompanied himself on guitar as he sang the wedding march.

Noticably missing from the gathering was Sol's brother, Larry Cuccinelli, who had to administer an emergency biology test to his eighth grade class.